Approved Parenting Classes
Children FIRST
Helping Parents Help Children Through Divorce
Children First Program
The Children First program provides divorcing parents the opportunity to learn about and discuss the effect that divorce and changing family situation had on children. With the assistance of a video tape presentation and discussion, parents are introduced to methods of minimizing the negative consequence of divorce on their children. Particular focus is on making parents aware of the various ways their children may express their reactions to the changing family structure.
Children First Classes are Required by the Courts
There are two very important reasons:
1) At the time parents approach a legal divorce, most are emotionally upset and primarily
involved in the changes in their lives. Even though they care greatly for their children,
most parents find it very difficult at this time to recognize and to respond to the needs
of their children. Therefore, classes are most helpful for parents and children at the
beginning of the divorce experience.
Also, we know that divorcing parents who do NOT cooperatively try to meet the needs of their
children, are often parents who return to court time and time again in an attempt to resolve
their differences. When parental conflict continues, it usually leads to "battles" over the
custody and visitation of the children. These battles are not only costly, but usually
result in ongoing conflicts and difficulties for the children.
2) The Judges and the Children First staff have found that if children experience negative
consequences as a result of their parent's divorce, these same children have an extremely
high probability of having difficulties later in their adolescent and/or adult years. The
Court hopes to minimize these negative consequences by requiring parents to attend the
Children First classes.
Both Parents Must Attend
Since it is necessary for divorcing parents to be aware of how to avoid destructive/negative
behaviors toward their children during the divorce process, and since we know that active
parenting of the children by both parents must continue even though the marital relationship
is ending, the court requires both adults to attend.
Note: Divorcing parents will be scheduled for different sessions unless they specifically
request the same class.
Cost For Children's First Classes
Each parent will be assessed a fee based on that parent's annual taxable income and number of
children. The fee will cover the cost of both sessions.
Children First Hopes to Help Parents
Experience has shown that divorce often includes a variety of conflicts between spouses that
can continue well beyond the legal divorce. When parental conflict is present, children are
adversely affected and may suffer for long periods of time. We know that when parents work to
develop cooperative plans in the best interest of their children that children can continue to
grow and develop in positive ways. The Children First program believes that given information
and guidance, parents will move beyond their differences to consider the best interest of their
children. The program believes in assisting parents to anticipate future events and/or problem
creating situations in the life of their family both during and after the divorce. Children's
birthdays, holidays, vacations, with whom children will spend these days and how the parents
must share responsibilities for their children are all issues which must be anticipated and
planned for.
"Children First" recognizes the importance of your parent-child relationship and will promote
and encourage your continued parenting of your children even though your marital relationship
is ending.
Please contact the Children First program for more information and/or an appointment.
Some Instructions for Children First Classes
Please do NOT bring children!
There are no facilities at the classroom site for children. The subject material in the video
and class discussion does not provide for a suitable environment for children regardless of
how well behaved they may be. We have found that they do disrupt class and that the parents
become distracted and less attentive to the course the material. If you cannot find someone to
watch you child(ren), please reschedule your class date. Parents who bring children to class
will not be allowed to participate.
Do Not bring unregistered adults to class.
Every parent attending scheduled classes must be pre-registered! The class moderator has been
instructed to turn away any person who is not a confirmed participant and on the class list.
Parents wishing to attend together, must request to be scheduled for the same class. Please
understand that this restriction is for the protection of the class participants. It is for
that reason that unregistered adults will not be allowed to be present in the class area.
Do Remember that your children did not ask for this
divorce and that they need all the help they can get to understand what has happened to their
parents.
Do Remember that these are not "small adults" endowed with the wisdom of maturity.
These are children and they do not understand why their world is being turned inside out.
Do Remember that they may not share the anger you have for the other parent.
Do Remember that patience, love and understanding will almost always be the best way
to help your children survive this life experience.